The other day, Jesse and I decided that we were tired of mistaking our dog for a walking fur-ball. We had also forgotten she has eyes.
So we decided to trim her. Instead of paying the $50 to take her to PetSmart, we decided to try it ourselves. I mean, how hard can it be, we thought.
I now have so much respect for dog-groomers! Even the sleezy minimum wage/parole guys. Unsuspecting optimists that we are, Jesse and I got ready by merely arming ourselves with an electric shaver and scissors.
We quickly did away with the electric razor. Clara’s coat was already so long and thick that that ship had long since sailed.
So we switched to scissors. We soon found that each snip-attempt had an expiration of about 2 seconds before she jerked or moved. Trying to follow a dog’s leg around with an open pair of scissors is scary, both for the person holding the dog and for the one who is thinking, “How am I going to explain a severed limb to the vet? Will they take my doggie away from me?”
Gradually, we hacked away at the massive bush that is Clara’s hair, only to discover that when you cut in 2 second intervals, the result is….less than consistent. More like trying to trim a bush caught in a cyclone while blindfolded. Let’s just say…Clara has a few bald spots.
"Mommy, will my hair ever look pretty again?"
Not only is it hard to cut hair evenly all around things like a BUTT and a TAIL and PAWS, but it’s hard when your dog is terrified of the sound or sight of scissors. You’d think she’d been tortured by scissors in a past life the way she was acting. Granted, this is probably what has occurred since then in her dreams, but we’ve been very good to our dog (really, we have!). So in order to get anything accomplished, Jesse or I had to sing to her to drown out the noise, close her eyes, and hold her still while the other person did the snipping.
We also had to alternate with different parts of her body, depending on how still she was being, saving the calmest of moments for her eyes and chin. We would get one side of her chin done, but have to wait for the other. This made for many moments of sad laughter, as either Jesse or I would exclaim, “Wow, that’s really awful looking.” It’s really hard to admit that your $200 dog looks like a rat.
Eventually we got to the point where all 3 of us were tired of the whole thing. So we decided to save the rest for later. The result was less than favorable. Notice how big her paws look in comparison to the rest of her body (we saved most of the leg hair for later since it’s the hardest).
Clara feels that she is too ugly in her current state to actually look at the camera
So much hair!!!
I made a hair animal. We will call her Daffodil.
Last night, Jesse and I decided to try for Round 2. Clara was much calmer this time, which made things much easier.
Clara in her new 'do'
So, even if it wasn’t perfect, it saved us money. And Clara is much happier now that she is able to cool off and walk around without tripping on her own hair.
Will we do it again? At this point, I’m not sure. $50 is a lot of money, but the 3 hours of our time that we will never get back? The psychological damage it did to our precious puppy? The slow dissolution of my dreams as a hairdresser? Suddenly $50 looks like the budget route.