Don’t Text While Driving!

Today, I opened class by warning my kids to never text message while they are driving.

Of course, there are safety reasons for this. But the main reason I brought it up was because I found out first hand today that it is very easy to send the WRONG text message to the WRONG person. Especially if you are driving.

Let me start at the beginning of the story, or it will sound crazy.Yesterday was a big day at church, mainly because the Metropolitan was in town. This event usually draws a lot of attention in the Texas-area, so it was not unusual to see more than the usual number of visitors. What IS unusual, is for the visitors to be extraordinary good-looking. As I was gazing out of the choir/kliros at the start of the service yesterday, I noticed a lot of very handsome people in the audience. I remember thinking, “Those people are WAY too good-looking to be Orthodox!” Don’t get mad at me- usually Orthodox men have gnarly beards and the women are shrouded by thick ugly shawls.

Anyways, things in the choir yesterday went okay- the “Trio” of women that sings before communion was a little bit off-key, as were some of the songs we sang, but overall nothing was too bad.

Then, at coffee hour, a nun came up to my friend Karen and, pointing to the ridiculously good-looking men in the corner, said, “You know who those people are, right? Those are the Hanson Brothers!”

For those of you who don’t remember this boy-band phenomenon, they were the Jonas-Brothers equivalent of my junior high experience. Every girl was crazy about them. My first roommate would play their song, “Mmm-Bop” over and over again until I thought my head would explode. Here’s what they currently look like:


I did not draw this arrow, by the way

Anyways, there they were, eating pastries and talking with people at our coffee hour. Apparently, they are Orthodox- their aunt is an Orthodox nun over in Greece. The oldest one (the one with the arrow) has a wife and kid.

Of course, my friend Karen went crazy, running around outside saying, “Mmm-Bop! Mmm-Bop is here!”. Then she realized that she’d just sung by herself in front of a bunch of pop stars, as she was part of the “Trio” that morning. I felt sorry for them having to listen to the choir. Then, again, I had to listen to them straight for my first 3 months of college, so I guess we’re even. I did try to get Brother Gregory, our favorite monk, to take a picture of them with my camera-phone, but he very vehemently declined, saying, “Kelly! They’re at CHURCH! Leave them be!”

Anyways, to get to the part about the text messaging. I sent a girly text message about, “Mmm-Bop” to several people, including Trenna, my mother and Tess. I didn’t think they would mind something so silly.

Turns out, as I was trying to text my boss on my way to work this morning, I accidentally re-sent the Hanson text message to him. I immediately realized what I had done and called him.

Boss: “Good morning.”

Kelly: “Don’t read the text message I just sent you!”

Boss: “Actually, I was just in the middle of it. What on Earth??”

Kelly: <thinking> This is the worst start to a day EVER.

So, this is why I warned my kids this morning to NEVER text while you are driving. You could get crushed by an 18-wheeler. Or become mortified as your boss finds out how much you love Hanson. Ouch.

3 thoughts on “Don’t Text While Driving!

  1. Kelly, you make me smile…and laugh…and pretty much, you just made my day.

    I always seem to miss the best days at y’all’s church. Make sure to plan something for the next two sundays.

  2. Too funny! I totally remember Hanson. I was never big fans but I do have a funny memory of my friend programing the Juke box at Denny’s to play MMM-Bop about 10 times in a row- and then we left all the people there to suffer through- much like your first 3 months of college I suppose.

  3. I get funny glances when ever I think of that Mmbop song. Probably because I then start singing the chorus 🙂 Also, what did the text say??? I never got it and want to know what made your boss go, “What on earth?”

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